Immodeficiency

According to the Belgian national newspaper De Standaard HIV stands for 'human immodeficiency virus'.

/facepalm. 

I know that the financial market has been relentlessly on home owners since this financial crisis. But apparently a defying "immobilien" (=real estate) virus is making more victims as we speak.

If you would adjust just a few words, it could have been an Onion-article.

Ph'lip ya for real.

The Belgian Postal Service has released a commemorative stamp for the 'trone swap' as it is literally translated. AKA: the abdication of Albert II.
Here's the original stamp as it will be sold in post offices across Belgium:

Here's what it actually should have looked like if it embodied the full spirit of a trone swap:

Thank you. I'll be here all night.

Press Conference

This weekend it's the F1 Belgian Grand Prix.
I was looking at some pictures from the press conference on Thursday and came across a funny one.
I just couldn't resist adding a few text captions.
It's probably a bit obscure if you're not following F1.

I love my printed words

Not popular

Judging by the reaction the same national newspaper receives from it's readers online, working for the government isn't very popular, despite reports there was a considerable increase in people wanting to apply for jobs.

In an article written for the Biz section (Biz as in short for Financial News, not Showbusiness -_-) sporting the title "The best and worst government jobs" it lists some boring stuff about boring jobs.
Anyway, in a bold font at the end of the article it says: "Should you think about applying for a government job, press the 'respond' button at the top of the page on the right."

...says the voice talking to the hand.

Subs on holiday

The subs of of one of the national newspapers are on a summer break and monkeys are filling in for them once more.

These gems were in the paper's online edition last Sunday:

First up is National News.
It reads "19 people dead in traffic accident in Egypt."

Second one from Wednesday's edition in Foreign News:
It reads: "Magnetic field of Sun about to turn."

You can't get any more foreign than that.
What happened to the Science News section by the way?

Headline hegemony

One of the national newspapers had me chuckling away again on Monday.

Three headlines on their online edition had randomly found their way next to each other.

They read: 

1) 'War agains sexual violence upped'

2) 'German bomber fished out of the Channel'

3) 'Delays possible for those who leave with airplane'

Freud would have had a field day.

Similar

I've spotted a peculiar simularity between the logo of 'Storify' and the logo of bankrupt Belgian national airline Sabena.
Are they in any way related? I think we should be told.

Strange things get cancelled during winter

More from the hilarious snow-news corner: while scanning the traffic pages of the police on Monday I came across a message displaying parts of roads that could be suffering from disruption due to roadworks.
But if you read it literally, that's not what is says, there is absolutely no mention of roadworks whatsoever.

"Nachtelijke hinder tussen St-Stevens-Woluwe en Heverlee.
van dinsdag 12 op woensdag 13 maart"

and then it says 'geannuleerd wegens winterweer'.

So in short it actually says: Nocturnal hindrance canceled by wintry weather.

Mihi.

Menace of the interior

I've just finished my first paper on interior design.
I tried to make it more light to write about interiors in comedy movies, but I got bogged down in philosophy and it turned out to be quite meta and is probably unreadable for lay people.
The professor I'm writing it for did get her post-doctoral degree in philosophy in München, so I hope she'll like it.


Here's the abstract:

"This paper explores the impact furniture and it surroundings have on the protagonist in neo-realist comedy. It is an exercise in combining formalist film theory with design studies, which both analyze forms of visual arts.

In the introduction the outline for a definition of the neo-realist comedy genre is sketched and the delineation of film theory is given and some philosophical underpinnings of design study are touched upon. 

Using several examples from 1950’s, 60’s and 70’s movies the argument is made that furniture exerts a power and hold over individuals. The underlying mechanisms are exposed throughout and common denominators analyzed by using theories explored in interior design studies.

Not only do some pieces of furniture pose as a menace to comfort and dignity, but also to reputation and -ultimately- life itself. Each category of menace is elaborated on. Some contemporary examples will be linked to the ideas behind the set design or revealing the unseen and unexplained.

It concludes that furniture serves as a gimmick on several levels to support the alienation of the individual in the society that is shown in cinema."

The title is: 'The menace of the interior. Furniture in neo-realist comedy' and it will probably never get published! 

Elio Di Rupo is a fictional character

I knew it all along. Elio Di Rupo, Belgian's Prime Minister, doesn't exist.
He has a flickr-page with pictures of him meeting and greeting people.
But according to his Flickr profile he has not given a real name.

Therefore he is a made-up character.
A figment of the imagination.
A ghost in the machine.
A creation of the media and the internet.

Mihi.

I'm not dead yet!

I'm still here my lovelies!
I've been awfully busy with... -erm- life in general.

New posts are in the pipe-line!

Big hugs,Mrs B

Working with a man-system

I take care of the administration since the workload spiraled out of control, but Dr Livingstone regularly takes ring binders and writes stuff on the back saying: 'This should go here from now on.'
Which is not cool, because I have my own system of filing stuff and we tend, to put it mildly, hold different opinions on the matter.

We used to have a binder with quotes we make for customers and quotes we receive.
It used to be in one binder. But because the number of quotes going both way have increased, he decided to separate them into two binders.
This is what he came up with:


I was confused as to what was in or what was out. Following conversation took place:
Dr L: ''The arrow pointing away from you are outgoing quotes'.
Mrs B: 'Yes, ok. But which one is that then? If I stand on the left side of the binders one of the arrows is indeed pointing away from me and if I stand on the other side, it points in my direction. So where should I be standing exactly?'
He walks over to the cabinet, not getting my question.
Dr L: 'Look, it is all very straight forward.'
Points randomly at binders.
Dr L: 'This one is in and this one is out. That arrow is pointing outward.'
Mrs B: 'I still don't get it. Why don't you just write IN and OUT on the back. They're not long words.'
Dr L: 'Because it is easy to remember.'
Walks away.

Several weeks later (in the mean time I forgot all about it and did not write in or out on the binder to avoid further confusion), I need to file something again, but forgot how the man-system works.
Dr L: 'It's fairly simple. The arrow pointing to the right is out. Just like handwriting.'
Mrs B: 'I don't follow.'
Dr L: 'Well, it's the same rule. We write from left to right. So to the right is out.'
Mrs B: 'Whatever.'
*writes IN and OUT on the back.

Is it a crime to ... ?

People look up stuff on google for different reasons.
Teh intertubes keep a list of what people are looking up.
I googled the phrase 'is it a crime to ...' and then worked my way through the alphabet.

Plenty of lulz ensued..

Here's my list of google search terms which corresponded with a laugh or a frown:

A is for trying
- Is it a crime to attempt a crime?

B is for fraude
- Is it a crime to bounce a check?

C is for adultery and terrorism
- Is it a crime to cheat on your wife?
- Is it a crime to contact al qaeda?

D is for stupidity
- Is it a crime to drive without insurance?

E is for overhearing
- Is it a crime to eavesdrop?

F is for disappearing and rude gesturing
- Is it a crime to fake your own death?
- Is it a crime to flip off a cop?

G is for anger management
- Is it a crime to get angry online?

H is for hacking
- Is it a crime to hack someones facebook?

I is for secret identity
- Is it a crime to impersonate a police officer/priest/someone/navy seal?

K is for killing
- Is it a crime to kill [fill in any noun in the english language]?

L is for growing a nose like Pinocchio
- Is it a crime to lie to [fill in a person]?

M is for love that knows no boundaries
Is it a crime to marry an illegal immigrant?

N is for not doing something tax related
- Is it a crime to not pay taxes/file taxes/file a tax return?

O is for snooping around
- Is it a crime to open [fill in anything mailbox related]?

P is for the informed criminal mastermind
- Is it a crime to plan a crime/pay for crime?

R is for going places
- Is it a crime to run over a dog/from the police/away?

S is for forcibly exiting saliva
- Is it a crime to spit on someone?

T is for intention
- Is it a crime to threaten [fill in random word]?

U is for relief and counterfeiting
- Is it a crime to urinate in public?
- Is it a crime to use a fake diploma?

V is for financial voyeurs
- Is it a crime to view someones bank accounts?

W is for concealment
- Is it a crime to wear a mask?

Y is for loud conversation
- Is it a crime to yell at someone?

J, Q, X and Z are not in there, no one has yet thought of anything crime-related beginning with J, Q, X or Z.
Funnily enough, those happen to be the letters in Scrabble which are 8 and 10 points!

Plate.

Mine. Just not big enough.
Day. Just got 24 hours.
Sleep. Just not enough of it.
Grades. Straight A's. Can't get enough of them.
Weather. Not enough degrees or sunshine.
Dr Livingstone. Dearest person in my life.
Mouser. Afraid of 2D polar bears in living room.

Pneumatology ≠ pneumology

I have this strange subject that, regardless what your field of study is, you are required to take it. It's called Religion, meaning and world-view. It bores the pants off if you're not into that kind of thing. Some theologist saying this and then another theologist not agreeing because of God knows what kind of reason.
The text we're using is larded with words like creed, revelation and eschatological.
Anyway.
I was reading through this bit of text on a certain Mr Jürgen Moltmann. I got through a paragraph but it didn't really make any sense.

It says (roughly translated): "In the third volume the insights from previous works are completed by reflections on ecclesiology and pneumatology."

I could't quite work out why a theologian would be remotely interested in combining religious studies with pulmonary diseases. Could it have been because of the crucifiction Jesus had a hard time breathing with all that water in his lungs?

It didn't make sense. None at all. The penny dropped quite late after a bit of confusion.
And then it dawned on me: Pneumatology is not the same as pneumology...

The King's Speech

The King's Speech was something almost worthy of an Oscar. I ran it through wordle and here is the word cloud it came up with.

Most used words are:
Onze (Ours)
Alle (All)
Land (Land)
Regering (Government)
Europese (European)
Europa
Nieuwe (New)
Samen (Together)
Burgers (Citizens)
Moeten (Must)
Recht (Right)

Surprisingly he only used België once.

Happy Birthday dear blog

4 years in the blogosphere today. What has happenend during the last year?
- We've moved house (again) and become houseowners, which is probably the biggest thing that could happen.
- Dr Livingstone's back and other skeletal bits and bobs have taken a turn for the worse.
- My bookcollection has grown (but not much).
- I've spent some lovely hours in the archive browsing through relicts from the past
- We still have no government after the elections in 2010 and we'll probably end up being the record holders of the entire universe [after Nepal]
- I haven't used the folding bike I bought back in October, my elbows still are not ok and I'm not even able to carry the thing a couple of meters.

What's coming next year?
- Finishing up two degrees in Art History.
- Dr Livingstone is negotiating a status quo for his aching body by going swimming three times a week.
- Refurbing a room or two and/or part of the garden.
- Helping out dear Dr Livingstone in his shop. The soldering art historian.
- Writing a lot of interesting papers and spending more time in dusty archives.

\o/

Bloggers are journalists?

In the news yesterday: A blogger who was dragged into court for calling a businessman a white collar criminal has been acquitted of libel. According to the court a blogger is a kind of journalist.

Actually he wasn't acquitted, the Court of Appeal ruled it could not judge a media related crime as it is not authorized to do so. So the first conviction was overturned.
Which leaves the business man with a choice: he can file his complaint again and then it will be tried by the Court of Assize. Which is rare, as press-related cases are very rarely tried before a jury. It just costs too much money to start up the procedure and magistrates are busy enough as it is with tons of other stuff.

So in a sense, what we should be looking at here is:
1) Why is a blogger seen as a journalist? Does that give him special powers? I think the blogger's lawyers 'don't shut up the freedom of the press'-line worked in this case, as the judge followed the same reasoning in his summing up.
Which is problematic at best, considering the context of the wording of the ruling isn't known. News outlets only copy the 'blogger is journalist' line. [Which, incidently, is something I'm doing too, just to direct a bit of traffic to my blog].

2) Why is this reported in media with the headline 'bloggers are journalists' when the judge clearly stated they are some kind of journalist. It is not the same. Anyway, the ruling isn't actually a ruling it has just dismissed the case, it will not have any impact irregardless if the lawyer of the defendant seems to think so. He is playing it up a bit me thinkst.
If the outcome was negative he would have got on his high horse and shouted that the freedom of speech had been tainted.

But in fact, the ruling from the first court seems correct to me and the judge in the Appeal Court played it safe.
If you are venting an opinion you are entitled to do so, but to publish it is something different.
Actually the plaintiff should prove, when bringing his case to court, he has actually suffered damage because of the alleged slander.
Now correct me if I'm wrong, but that is what I can remember from my media-ethics classes. It does not suffice to just go: 'I've been insulted'. That is how the stupid British Libel laws work. Not here.

I don't know the details of the original case but I'd like to find out.

Panthera gardengnomus

A rare specimen of the recently discovered Garden Panther (Panthera gardengnomus negra) feeding on its pray. This species, spotted throughout Northern Europe, thrives in its natural habitat in suburbuban Flanders. Known for its impertinence toward garden furniture, this soletary hunter is known to manipulate the Homo sapiens urbanus and taunt the female Canis lupus familiaris from next door.