Matches

More on the tacky side of life: a hideous electric fireplace, with all the fake trimmings to make it look real, like a rotating transparant filter to simulate smoke, sparkles on the logs to make them shimmer, dimable lights for effect.
It just had to go. We put it up for sale on internet.

So on Saturday these people come over to collect the thing. Dr Livingstone explains how it works, how you can flip a switch to increase the heat and turn on the fan etc.
Suddenly the lady asks: 'So you don't need matches to light it then?'.

ROFLCOPTER

Really. I don't know how Dr Livingstone managed to maintain a straight face.

We should have thrown a packet of matches into the bargain for free. It would have been all kinds of awesome when they took it home and lit it on fire...